kalluto's cabin (SFW)

[devil_or_angle]

*after alluka and nanika's ill-fated birthday party has passed, killua leaves her to sleep off her indigestion and sets off down the hall. there's dread in his uneasy heart, a suspicion that there's something his sisters have been keeping from him all this time. not ready yet to confront them about it, he shows up instead at his brother's door with dark circles under his eyes and unkept hair, haggard from all he's been through over the past days and nights. as soon as kalluto answers it, he questions:*

what do you know about the other alluka?

Comments

[descendsanathema]

*In his dream, Kalluto is in his old world, not his home world, with the most promising lead he's had for years. It's fresh enough that he can't wait for a few weeks for a good time to confer with Gon. There's an eerie presence, one that can't quite be pinned down to nen, or the more vacuous killing intent of an unawakened ambush either, but with notes of both. He plods quiet as he can down a dank, murky rock tunnel, eddying breezes circulating to push against him at the mouth of an opening. Whatever's inside, it picked an excellent spot to hide.

Well before his eyes adjust, before he finds two piles of bones inside picked clean of carrion, normal breath stuffs his nostrils with a heavy smell teeming with so many traces of dried blood that it might as well just be blood.

He knows that it's his brother's, too, but his first thought isn't horror, or grief, or fear.

How do I know that smell? I barely spoke to this one-

A distinct, rhythmic noise against his door neatly shifts him out of sleep. Muscle memory has him yawning, stretching, as he walks into pyjamas, then to the door, but he's still in the cave. When he opens it, he's too relieved to see his brother, too unsettled by the dream, that he hugs him tight as he can, a vice, a clamp, needing Killua against him with a desperation that surprised him, thinking he'd gotten that out of his system in the field, or the sailing world.*

You're alright.

Uh... come inside, better to talk in there.

*Behind Kalluto was the four poster bed and the generously sized, comfortable couch that Killua might recognise from his brother's bedroom, though the finery was much less... fine.

After pulling back, Kalluto moved aside, giving Killua the space to walk past him and decide where to sit.*

[devil_or_angle]

i'm...

*killua gulps, the tight squeeze sending his mind reeling through the recent past, reminding him how close he'd just been to death at the jaws of his most trusted and beloved sister. did kalluto know? could he smell it on him?*

...yeah.

*he follows kalluto inside, shutting the door behind him. he hasn't been invited into this cabin since the day kalluto arrived, and though it seems some things have shifted around since then, he still plops himself down on the couch as if he knew the space by heart, leaning back with an exhausted sigh.*

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto didn't feel like he was clinging to his brother, but his outstretched arm lingered, fingertips hovering for just a moment too long where Killua's side had been. He walked into the centre of the room, both arms behind his back, confused.*

What do I know? I don't know much that didn't reach me from you via our family...

[devil_or_angle]

*a frustrated huff falls from killua's lips as he looks up at his brother, expression grim.*

i don't remember any of that now. just tell me what you know.

[descendsanathema]

*He's stopped in his tracks by how serious Killua was. He states the rules, by rote, but his mind is whirring with the implications and what his next move should be.*

If Alluka knows your name, she can ask a request of you.
Fulfil three of Alluka's demands, and the other one grants you one wish. Requests are harder the bigger the wish - from playing games, to giving up a fingernail, right up to wrenching whole-body systems like your entire skeleton out of your body to give her.
Fail a request four times, you and the person you love the most are crushed to death.
If the last wish was bigger, more will die. The people you spent the most time with are wrung to death in descending order.
After deaths, the request difficulty is reset. Back to something like a pat on the head.

*Their older brother can manipulate memories, can even wipe a person's presence if they've only known them a few years. To take more away, without something equivalent to a lobotomy, he'd need...

He stops, realising he'd forgotten that while Killua was family, this kind of family business is not something you can just drop all at once. He waits for Killua to take this in.*

[devil_or_angle]

*killua listens in chilling silence as his brother recites the rules he seems to know by heart, but were forcibly wrenched from killua's long ago. each staggered heartbeat pumps ice through his veins as the consequences get more and more dire, worse even than what she did to him -- and worse so if he had refused. how many had? enough for the family to learn the terrible terms, and lock her away to exploit them.

even after kalluto has finished speaking, killua doesn't respond, frozen over in horror. so this was the truth about his sister's innocent requests, her indomitable power. she was, by far, the deadliest zoldyck of them all.*

[descendsanathema]

*He was suddenly caught between wanting to get this scary, unpleasant thing over with, and not wanting to seem too clinical. This was a lot to take in - but why is all of this new information to him?*

They need to touch someone to heal them.
With concrete true-false conditions, you can make two requests. You used that to blackmail Dad into letting you take her out. Oh, but you never did that, so...

*Kalluto's grasp on objectivity faltered, and it got him thinking about what else might be different about the Killua in front of him. Kalluto had never heard this from his world's Gon, and his Killua was never available to check, either. But Killua must have known about the rules since before Alluka was locked away, or Illumi wouldn't have had to deduce more by outfoxing him. Which means...*

Do you remember nothing about our sister? From your own world, I mean.

*Because that could mean only one thing.*

[devil_or_angle]

no, nothing. i met her here.

*killua's digs sharpened nails into his knees, head storming. he can't get past the realization that if he'd refused her, not only would he have died but everyone he loves -- maybe even alluka herself. he could have massacred the whole airship. one hand clutches at his side instead, grips at the flesh he'd torn open to sate her hunger.*

what... what is she?

[descendsanathema]

*Without thinking, Kalluto closed the distance between them, a light touch and twist fanning his own hands under his brother's, then cupping them above Killua's knees, softly disarming him and protecting him from himself at once. The touch was incidental to him. He watched one hand, which shifted to his side rather than limply drop. Satisfied, he looked into Killua's eyes instead.*

We never found out. Gon had never asked you before you went missing... told me it was a sensitive topic between the two of you... sorry, the him and you from my world...

*He frowned.*

Did she make requests? Illumi was adamant that you could wish freely, somehow...

*but if my Killua got an impossible one... that would explain why they both vanished without a trace...

Kalluto's hands fell to his sides, now numb everywhere.*

[devil_or_angle]

*the touch gets him to retract his claws, though they still prick his side through the fabric of his shirt. he finally raises his gaze to meet kalluto's as his hands fall away, both their eyes dark and hollowed out with horror.*

i have, before... but this time, she asked me. i thought it was a payment for my last wish... to save my life.

*his mind continues to reel as it tries to make sense of all the new rules he's just learned, trying to fit together the jumbled puzzle pieces of what happened.*

[descendsanathema]

*His body can barely move, his mind and mouth enough energy for what he can handle. He doesn't even look to his couch, to contemplate that this might be easier for them both if he sits down. He leans forward, lets his upper body rest against his brother's legs, resolve firming against them.*

No. Can't be. Gon never asked, Killua never volunteered, but one thing my Killua did tell Gon was everything after he collapsed fighting...

*He hesitated, having to consider the delicate nature of the airship, and Pitou's contrition. And how he was the only one on it that seemed to have lived out this particular future.*

... a very strong enemy. He made a vow - use it all in one go. All the aura he'd ever control in his life. I wasn't there, but my Killua told him he looked worse than anyone he'd killed. Like his whole soul was gone from his body. It got him back from that. For just a few pats on the head.

The other Alluka never makes a cruel request after healing.

[devil_or_angle]

gon... did that?

*now wracked by horror more powerful than any he's ever known, killua drops his head into his hands, claws reemerging to dig into his scalp instead. he can't even imagine gon in the state kalluto described, can't imagine his brilliant light leaving his eyes and leaving him an empty shell. his heart feels raw, beating exposed in a torn open chest. he realizes now that he never knew the meaning of pain until he learned to love.*

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto lifted his arms again, again wanting to spindle Killua's hands off of himself, but they fell slack. It didn't feel right to deny Killua the catharsis. His palm ran circles along Killua's back instead.

'He never did get his nen back', was what he wanted to say. But at once Kalluto decided that this Killua would only see the vulnerability. Kalluto himself would say, deprived of the cudgel, Gon adapted something else entirely into a scalpel. The first time Kalluto saw him - defiant, sullen. Fierce. Devoted. Back then, becoming a scalpel is the last thing he'd have expected of him.*

Let it out, *Kalluto said, more confidently than he felt.*

I'm not going anywhere.

[devil_or_angle]

*kalluto's soothing touch brings warmth back to his veins, the swirling fog clearing as the new information sinks in, processes through his throbbing skull. under his breath, he murmurs dizzily,*

but... she saved him. and no one died...

*starting to see the path through the haze of confusion, he continues with gradually increasing clarity and confidence.*

so, the payment she just took from me... that wasn't for saving my life. someone else must have wished for something... something big. and i took the punishment.

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto listens, not exactly sure what's going on or who is who. On hearing the word "payment", his eyes widen and his touch stiffens, having an inkling that's confirmed with the rest of his sentence. After a minute, his hand starts to move again, along Killua's shoulders.*

It takes a lot more to change the past than heal from it.

*He catches his thumb tracing the underside of Killua's jaw, and stops.

Maybe that's what all of this was about.*

[devil_or_angle]

*change the past... he'd made a wish like that once, hadn't he? had someone else suffered the consequences of that without him knowing? or maybe it wasn't a big enough change to warrant such a harsh punishment... unlike whatever the last wish was.

killua lifts his chin, upturning his face to look at kalluto in tandem with his coaxing fingers. his expression is grave, stricken with the fear of losing the delicate life he's carved out for himself and his friends and family on the airship.*

i've got to tell everyone... don't i? to protect them... and protect her.

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto felt stronger than he was, seeing desperate resignation written all over his big brother's face, mind sprinting instead of panicking at whatever must have Killua worried.

Unconsciously, he stroked the side of Killua's face, distantly aware that in another mood, he'd be worried whether he was Manipulating them. Was he now, anyway? Or had he grown out of Illumi's shadow, become more than a defiant antumbra?

Illumi would say that there was only one way to protect everyone. Was he making the right choice avoiding that instead of at least running it by Killua?*

That's a little hasty, isn't it? The less people who tell her their name, the less people you have to worry about. Who made the wish... and why?

*Once he did it, it felt good, pushing aside the idea. But he wouldn't just defer to Killua now, either.*

[devil_or_angle]

*killua frowns, blinking up at his brother before his brow furrows in resistance.*

so what, i should just keep alluka away from everyone? not let her make any friends?

*all he wanted for her was a normal life. somewhere far away from the manipulative assholes who'd imprisoned her, even if he now knows why. with a power like hers, could she ever just be a regular girl? he grips his hair again before slowly dropping his hands, palm-up on his thighs as her stares down at them.*

but it's not her fault, is it? it's nanika...

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto flinches at Killua's frown, but keeps his hand soft against his brother, runs it through his hair as he looks down at his lap.

There were a few alternatives, none of which really amounted to the type of freedom that Killua seemed to want for their sister. Would making people use an alias around her work? The family never tested-

A strange word interrupted Kalluto's train of thought, and with that came a sudden disdain for stumbling, again into the family's line of thinking. People would need to die to know whether that worked.*

That word... Nanika... why are you using it like a name?

[devil_or_angle]

*killua gulps, lost in thoughts too treacherous to voice. could he really be considering choosing one over the other? betraying the sweet, doll-faced phantom he'd willingly torn himself apart to please? he answers kalluto's question slowly, guilt curling his fingers back into fists on his lap.*

that's... what she calls her. the other alluka.

*he looks up again at his brother, jaw clenching.*

our other sister.

[descendsanathema]

"Nanika."

*He lets the word work around his tongue, the sound taking on a completely new meaning as a name. It seemed odd to name something that just appeared to make requests and grant wishes, unless...*

"Can you talk to her? Nanika, I mean."

[devil_or_angle]

*killua nods, now kneading nervously at his knees.*

most of the time, she's asleep. but sometimes she'll come out if i ask her to.

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto walked over to the couch, sitting close to Killua. He put his arm around his brother, wanting to comfort him, but as soon as their sides were pressed close together, he knew it was for himself, too.

Distantly, blankly, he noted the absence of any of the... strange drives... that had permeated this sort of touch in the garden, and in the plastic world.

He spoke against Killua's skull, finding his lips and face nestled into the floof adorning it, suddenly craving the stimulation. It helped, since he was trying to wrap his mind around the concept of the other Alluka - of Nanika, not 'nanika' - having a distinct personality.*

Are you... okay, right now? You don't need to think of a plan right this second.

[devil_or_angle]

*lost in his own thoughts, killua barely registers the warm press of his brother's body against his side, fluttering a blink only when he feels his breath against his ear. he croaks out a response, shaking his head.*

yeah, i'm -- i mean, she healed me...

*the distant stare in his eyes suggests the opposite of his words.*

[descendsanathema]

*Kalluto gasped, getting tufts of hair caught between his lips, before pulling his face back, wiping his mouth, nuzzling at his brother with his mouth tightly closed.*

Then she really did... you...

*He squeezed Killua tight.*

How bad was it? Worse than the worst you've been injured on a job?